A dawdling issue

Young children are not conscious of time but with patience and preseverance, they can learn to get their act together
theSun, Tue, 25 Jan 2011

INSTEAD of dressing up quickly for school in the morning, my child reads her storybook between wearing her uniform, combing her hair and coming downstairs for breakfast. If I don’t yell "hurry up", she’d probably be late for school.

A check with other mothers assures me that I’m not alone in this constant battle against time and a dawdling child, be it getting ready for school, doing homework or going out.

It appears that dawdling is quite characteristic of young children, some more than others. This is because young children are not conscious of time and, therefore, lack a sense of urgency.

They live in the moment. They have yet to develop the ability to control their need for instant gratification or think and plan ahead.

Even when they have learnt to tell the time and know what they need to do, they tend to be easily distracted.

In my search for practical solutions, I managed to come up with a few I learnt from reading and others I’m already doing on my own. They include:

Prepare ahead of time
To reduce morning rush stress, prepare as much as possible the night before. Fill her water bottle and set aside all breakfast necessities in a tray. This way, you reduce time spent in the morning gathering up everything from the various sections of your kitchen.

If you need to cook breakfast or school lunch, cut, slice, prepare whatever you can the night before so that they can be easily cooked or assembled in the morning.

Help your child set aside her clothes before she goes to bed so that she doesn’t waste time looking for matching socks or a missing hair-band.

Be specific
For example, instead of saying: "Hurry up", you should say: "Stop reading and please put on your clothes now".

Break instructions down to a few steps

When I’m in a hurry, I tend to ramble off reminders and instructions in a long string of words. Keep instructions short as your child will most likely forget all that you ask, especially when she is distracted.

Minimise distractions
At the time and place where you know your child needs to get ready, keep her away from distractions such as toys, the television, or storybooks. Make sure toys and books are put away and the television is not on.

Build in incentives
Tell your child that if she can get ready or finish her homework on time, she can have extra time to play later. Remind her also of the consequences if she is too slow or late.

Invent games
One mother as mentioned in a Parenting Institute article published by SchoolFamily.com came up with a game called Beat the Clock to help her son focus and finish his homework.

After determining roughly the time taken for him to finish his work, she set the timer with five minutes extra to make it possible for her son to achieve the goal and win the game.

She said: "The game enabled him to concentrate on the task at hand." And it "made him realise on his own what he was capable of doing without being nagged or threatened".

Lastly, don’t forget patience and perseverance. They should grow out of the habit of dawdling eventually.